Editor: DebsSweet
Graphic Editors: Ditziexx, LuvintheCountry,
CrispySue, Kittykab
Hey y'all
Our economy is definitely in the toilet - so let's try for
just a few minutes to tune the bad out -- and tune into
some smiles for a change. I have some good
info so please check out the links.
Hilarious link in the SURF section! It's the first one! A N D
The composition of the tax hikes in the 2010 budget is frighteningly similar to the Revenue Act of 1932,
the much-maligned Hoover tax hikes that put the “Great” in Great Depression by putting an enormous tax
burden on millions of Americans, largely through excise taxes. You will
find this link in the SURF section
Please don't skip the HEALTH Links - the future is now in the
regeneration of cells - body parts!
If you would like to SIGN UP or BE REMOVED (sure, remove yourself,
break my heart
and force me into therapy for life) from this mailing list, please send an
email
to me, DebsSweet and your request will be handled promptly - or whenever
I feel like it
Kick up your feet and put your problems behind you cause darlin' it's time to
ROCK AND ROLL!
and don't forget to buckle your seatbelts, cause it's going to be a wild ride!
"Soooo glad to see you back!"
Italian Clicker
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"President Obama gave his first State of the Union address.
The president says he intends to expand healthcare, improve
education, and decrease energy dependence — all while
cutting the deficit in half. Then, he's going to make the
Washington Monument disappear."
Jimmy Kimmel
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Open source for hard times | Open Source | ZDNet.com
Friend of the blog Erica Zeidenberg, who represents the good folks at Palamida, has been
flogging an “open source job hunters toolkit,” filled with open source programs you can use, free, in your job hunt - yes free.
Kid-Key-Lock is a simple program to selectively lock specific keyboard and mouse functions.
You can use kid-key-lock to lock any of the mouse buttons, double clicks and/or the mouse wheel.
Regarding the keyboard, Kid-Key-Lock can be used to lock character keys, navigation keys,
function keys and/or system shortcuts (such as Alt-F4, Alt-Tab, "Start" key)
This document lists 10 enhancements you should make to every new Windows PC,
no matter whether it is a workstation or the family media computer.
10+ essential (and free) Windows applications, from George Ou - Downloads - TechRepublic
When George Ou builds a new Windows computer, he installs a dozen of his favorite free apps.
Not only do they fill essential functions, they're all well-behaved installers and uninstallers:
no crashing the computer or gunking it up. See how to make the most of your
computer without spending a dime on software.
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Mike: Do you remember first meeting your wife?
John: Sure, I found Jill lying face down in the gutter.I lifted her to her feet
and
promised her that if she agreed to marry me, she would begin a new life
and I'd never
allow her near the gutter again.
Mike: Wow, I hope she appreciates what you did for her.
John: Not really. Jill hated to give up bowling.
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One day a diver was enjoying the aquatic world 20 ft below sea
level.
He noticed a guy at the same depth he was, but he had on no scuba gear
whatsoever.
The diver went below another 20 ft, but the guy joined him a few
minutes later. The diver went below 25 ft, but minutes later, the same
guy joined him. This confused the diver, so he took out a waterproof
chalk-and-board set, and wrote, "How the hell are you able to stay under
this deep without equipment?"
The guy took the board and chalk, erased what the diver had written,
and wrote, "I'M DROWNING, YOU MORON!!!"
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|
Reality is only an illusion |
v v v v v
The Top 8 Ways to Tell Your
SO You're Late (Period)
8> "Good news for you, honey! My girlfriends are going to find
out I was lying when I told them you were impotent."
7> Tell him not to plan any town hall meetings for November.
6> "Honey, you know how you're always saying you wish your
brother would settle down and have some kids?"
5> "You know how you've always hated other men seeing me in a
bikini? Good news!"
4> "Do you think the pool boy's cute arse is genetic?"
3> "The Red River doesn't run through ol' Virginny anymore."
2> Throw up on him every morning. He'll get the hint.
and the Number 1 Way to Tell Your SO You're Late ...
1> "Would you like my tits to be bigger?"
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YouTube - Lisa Lampenelli and Simon Cowell
ROTFLMAO!!!!
harlmilligan
ShaynaButtons
Absolutely fun fun fun!! A must see!
Find the clover!
Obama’s Scary Hoover-Style Tax Hikes « FOX Forum « FOXNews.com <--------- ! ! ! !
The composition of the tax hikes in the 2010 budget is frighteningly similar to the Revenue Act of 1932,
the much-maligned Hoover tax hikes that put the “Great” in Great Depression by putting an
enormous tax burden on millions of Americans, largely through excise taxes.
Glenn Beck - Current Events & Politics - Picture of the Day - February 26, 2009
The average price of housing hasn't really changed (adjusted for inflation) aside from the Great Depression.
What is the other period that sticks out as being fantastically different? You guessed it -- right now.
It's in the other direction, but that's possibly even more dangerous. Take a look at the chart
How to: Keep your laptop from being stolen | The Toybox | ZDNet.com
A laptop is stolen every 53 seconds, and approximately 97 percent are never recovered, according to the FBI. Worse,
one out of every 10 laptops will be stolen within the first 12 months of purchase. Will you be next?
TV.com: TV News - TV Shows - TV Listings - Entertainment News
Shows, listings, news, photos
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You might be having a bad day if...
Your horn sticks on the freeway behind 32 hell's angels.
You call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.
You get to work and find a "60 minutes" news team waiting in your
office.
Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
You turn on the evening news and they are showing emergency routes out of the
city.
Your twin brother/sister forgets your birthday.
Your 4-year old tells you that it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit
down the toilet.
You discover that your 12-year-old's idea of humor is putting crazy glue in
your
preparation-H.
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Idiots sex guide
1. Intercourse doesn't happen on a highway.
2. There is no need for dice in role playing.
3. Eating Mexican food is not the cause of gonorrhea.
4. If the woman engages in oral sex first,
it's not called a head start.
5. If she says she's into "bondage,"
don't try and show her your financial portfolio.
6. You can lie down during a one-night stand.
7. Making out doesn't mean getting your money's worth.
8. Only sleep with someone you love or
can say you love without smirking.
9. When a woman talks about waiting for the
"right time," she's not referring to a commercial break.
10. Sex is like "The Club" - accept no substitutes.
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What's the difference
between a rottweiler peeing up against your leg and
a poodle peeing up against your leg?
You let the rottweiler finish.
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Savor Life, Slow Down for Meals | ThirdAge Articles
One of the problems in our daily lives is that many of us rush through the day, with no time for anything ...
and when we have time to get a bite to eat, we gobble it down.
That leads to stressful, unhealthy living
Gene Test Helps Set Accurate Blood Thinner Dose | ThirdAge Articles
People taking warfarin, a leading blood thinner to prevent clots that cause heart attacks and strokes,
soon may have a better way to get the tricky dose right. A new formula that includes gene testing
proved much better at setting the ideal dose than what doctors do now
Heart Attack, Stroke and Cardiac Arrest Warning Signs
I ran this link a long time ago - might want to bookmark it
Foot-Care Specialists | Lifescript.com
At some point, you should see a diabetes educator – usually a nurse, physician’s assistant, dietitian, pharmacist or
other health-care professional – to learn how to take care of your feet properly and
avoid or delay the onset of any diabetic foot complications.
Is Bypass Truly Better than Stenting?
In people with severely blocked heart arteries, bypass surgery produced better results than angioplasty plus
the implantation of a stent, and thus "remains the standard of care" in such cases, according to an international study.
But that assessment is disputed by one of the cardiologists involved in the study and an expert who wrote an accompanying editorial.
The benefits and disadvantages of both procedures are so evenly balanced, they said,
that a decision on which should be used can be left in most cases to the person being treated.
Breathing Training Benefits Heart-Surgery Patients
Modern medicine is turning to life's simplest and most essential activity to help heart-surgery patients: breathing.
Patients undergoing coronary artery bypass graft (CABG) who are at high risk for pulmonary complications,
such as pneumonia, reduced that risk by performing breathing exercises
and receiving respiratory muscle training before surgery.
jacksinfla
YouTube - Regeneration of cells - CBS Cutting Edge
Yes! It's happening now. The future is NOW.
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A friend of mine had resisted efforts to get him to run with our jogging group until his doctor told him he had to exercise.
Shortly thereafter, he reluctantly joined us for our 5:30am jogs on
Mondays, Wednesdays and
Fridays.
After a month of running, we decided that my friend might be hooked,
especially when he said,
"I've discovered what runner's euphoria is."
When we questioned this, he explained,
"Runner's euphoria is what I experience at 5:30am on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and Sundays."
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A man in Topeka, Kansas
decided to write a book about churches
around the country. He started by flying to San Francisco and started
working east from there.
Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs
and making notes.
He spotted a golden telephone on the vestibule wall and was
Intrigued with a sign, which read 'Calls: $10,000 a minute.' Seeking
out the pastor
He asked about the phone and the sign. The pastor answered that this
golden phone is, in fact, a direct line to heaven and if he pays the price he
can talk directly to GOD.
The man thanked the pastor and continued on his way. As he
continued
to visit churches in Seattle, Denver, St. Louis, Chicago,
Milwaukee, and around the United States, he found more phones, with
the same sign, and the same answer from each pastor.
Finally, he arrived in Mississippi, upon entering a church in Byram, Ms.
behold - he saw the usual golden telephone. But THIS time, the
sign
read 'Calls: 35 cents.'
Fascinated, he asked to talk to the pastor, 'Reverend, I have been
In cities all across the country and in each church I have found this
golden Telephone and have been told it is a direct line to Heaven and that I
could talk to GOD, but in the other churches the cost was $10,000 a minute.
Your sign reads only 35 cents a call. Why?'
The pastor, smiling benignly, replied, 'Son, you're in the South now .
You're in God's Country, It's a local call.'
(American by Birth - A Southerner by the Grace of God)
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In honor of the mother
of the octuplets, Denny's is offering a new breakfast
meal called the Suleman:
You get eight eggs, no
sausage, and the guy next to
you has to pay the bill.
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Well, did you hear about the constipated accountant?
He couldn't budget
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BADVETTE87
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"I've got some good news and some bad news" the doctor says.
"What's the bad news?" asks the patient.
"The bad news is that unfortunately you've only got 3 months
to live". The patient is taken aback, "What's the good news
then, Doctor?"
The doctor points over to the secretary at the front desk,
"You see that blonde with the big breasts, tight ass and
legs that go all the way up to heaven?"
The patient nods his head. The doctor replies, "I'm fucking her."
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The Top 7 Songs About the Energy Crisis
7> The Rolling Stones: Pumping Back Gas
6> Aretha Franklin: R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Boone Pickens
5> Eddy Grant: Reduced Electric Output Avenue
4> Prince: Little Red Prius
3> The Beatles: Baby You Can't Drive My Car
2> Bruce Springsteen: Blinded by the Light Crude Prices
and the Number 1 Song About the Energy Crisis...
1> Rush: Distant Early Warming
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Why can’t a computers start up like a television? In short, it is all about the operating system.
And contrary to common sense, the newer the operating system the longer it can take.
But you can do something about it.
Here are tips to get your tortoise-like boot time to hop like a bunny.
Windows 7 is coming. So what? - USATODAY.com
You may be aware that Microsoft is readying a new operating system. It's been dubbed Windows 7.
When it is released, you can expect brass bands, dancing girls and mighty huzzahs. But why?
Windows runs your machine. It's the middleman. It tells your programs and your computer
how to work together. In geekese, it manages resources. Don't worry about that
Redmond | Feature Article: Will Windows 7 Be Microsoft's Redemption?
Early versions of Windows Vista's successor could burnish the
operating system's tarnished reputation in the desktop market
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ShaynaButtons
The nice thing about being senile is
You can hide your own Easter eggs
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Man, here's something chilling. Former Vice President Dick
Cheney is now warning that there will be another terrorist attack.
He got that information by waterboarding himself.
David Letterman
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Tangerine Vodka Sour
1 oz Vodka
1 oz Tangerine Schnapps
Fill with Sweet and Sour Mix
Ice
Add 2 oz flavor mix or Schnapps for a Cherry, Peach,
Blackberry, Raspberry, Strawberry or Wild Tangerine
Vodka Sour
Chihuahua
1 oz Tequila
1 oz Cherry Mix
Fill with grapefruit juice
Ice
Add 2 oz flavor mix or Schnapps for a Cherry, Peach
Blackberry, etc
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A surgical patient was given the usual postoperative instructions.
That night she called, wanting to know if her mother could visit.
"Any time," the doctor replied. "Why do you ask?"
"It says here in your instructions, 'no relations until after your
post-op checkup.'"
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Assia Wevill, Sylvia Plath's Rival and Ted Hughes' Doomed Love
by Yehuda Koren, Eilat Negev
Assia Wevill, known as the woman who took Ted Hughes from Sylvia Plath,
not only lived in Plath’s apartment after her suicide by carbon-monoxide poisoning but killed herself and
her four-year-old daughter in the same manner, six years later.
This biography recounts a nomadic childhood spent in Berlin, Pisa, and Tel Aviv; etc etc!
I enjoyed this book - it's different as biographies tend to be! Tragic, interesting
life of Assia Wevil - I get tired just thinking about it. Not a great book, but a good one.
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The Dean of Women at
an exclusive girls' school was lecturing her
students on sexual morality.
"We live today in very difficult times For young people. In moments
of temptation," she said, "ask yourself just one question: Is an hour
of pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?"
A young woman rose in the back of the room and said, "Excuse
me, but how do you make it last an hour?"
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Three guys were sitting at
the bar. The first guy said, "You
know, I'm really lucky. When my wife makes love, she's like an
acrobat. She can get into the most incredible positions."
The second guy said,
"I'm lucky, too. My wife is like a world-class
pianist when we have sex. She's got the most talented hands you
can imagine."
No one spoke for a moment.
Then the first guy said to the third guy, "George how's you wife in bed?"
George took a sip of his
beer, then replied, "I guess you could say that my wife
makes love like a chess player."
"A chess player?"
"Yeah. Every twenty minutes, she moves."
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BADVETTE87
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A first-grader came to the ophthalmology office where I work to have
his vision checked. He sat down and I turned off the lights. Then
I switched on a projector that flashed the letters F, Z and B on a
screen. I asked the boy what he saw. Without hesitation he replied,
"Consonants."
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The fellow who had to see his physician almost every day because
of his erratic bowel habits got the label of the "constapatient"
by the doctor's assistant.
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"A tabloid published a picture of Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps
at a party taking a huge bong hit. I think there's an important
lesson to be learned here, kids. Never share your pot with someone
who has the lung capacity of a dolphin." Conan O'Brien
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A young man walked into our insurance office to purchase coverage
for his new motorcycle. Only one question confused him. "Do you
have a lien holder on the vehicle?"
"I've got a
kickstand," the
prospect replied. "Is that the same thing?"
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"Westminster Dog Show is the granddaddy of them all. It is
the Oscars of dog shows. It's just like the Oscars, except the
speeches are shorter and there's slightly less butt-sniffing."
Craig Ferguson
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Gigantic Caterpillar Found
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"In Egypt, they discovered a tomb packed with mummies. Not one
mummy - it was packed. In the future when they dig up Los Angeles,
all they will find are thousands of silicone implants. They'll
think that people of ancient times all came with airbags."
Craig Ferguson
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Pop diva Britney Spears recently opened
a Manhattan restaurant named
NYLA (for
New York and her home state of
Louisiana).
The Top 14 Things Overheard at Britney Spears's New
Restaurant
14> "Crotch-ground pepper, sir?"
13> "Have you tried our new Eminem dessert? It's white chocolate
with a really cheesy filling."
12> "I don't get it -- nobody wants to try my 'Cream of Justin'
soup."
11> "Oops...They burned it again!"
10> "These prices aren't the only inflated things around here."
9> "Ah, yes, the tea -- a fine choice! The hot water is Ms.
Spears's own recipe."
8> "Virgin Bloody Mary, my ass."
7> "But Ms. Spears, I think we're facing a lawsuit if we call
those cocktail wieners the 'Justin Timberlake
Special.'"
6> "How come there's only one dessert -- Flavor-of-the-Month
Tart?"
5> "Let me lip-synch today's specials for you."
4> "Don't order the melons; I hear they're not organic."
3> "That's not a Pepsi, that's a Pepsi Twist. And that's not
Shakira bussing tables... oh wait, yes it is."
2> "I'd like my burger cooked 'not a cow, not yet a cinder,' please."
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Thing
Overheard
at Britney Spears's New
Restaurant...
1> "You'd like to take the rest of that home? No problem --
let me get you a Christina bag."
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Top 10 Pop Concert Tours Spring-Summer 2009 - The Top 10 Concerts to Watch For in 2009
It' an outstanding season of top concert tours ranging from top bill veterans to the hottest newcomers in pop music.
Follow links to details on dates, cities, venues and purchase of tickets.
Catching a live concert by a top pop artist can be an unforgettable experience.
Don't miss out. Find out details on your favorites
Internet Jazz Radio - List of Jazz Internet Radio Sites
As soon as you visit Pandora, you are prompted to type in the name of your favorite artist or song.
Using a system known as the Music Genome Project, Pandora chooses music that you might like based on your selection.
From there, it sets up a “station,” or a pool of tracks by artists who fit into the same category,
which is defined by things like melody, harmony, rhythm, and instrumentation.
Soca Music 101 - Introduction To Soca Music
Soca is a style of music native to the islands of Trinidad and Tobago. It is a blend of traditional calypso
and classial Indian Music. Soca was invented in the 1960s and is currently one of
the most popular genres of Caribbean music in the world
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Suffering from a bad case of the flu, the outraged patient bellowed,
"Three weeks? The doctor can't see me for three weeks? I could
well be dead by then!"
Calmly the voice at the other end of the line replied, "If so, would
you have your wife call to cancel the appointment?"
"Americans grew tired of being thought to be dumb by the rest
of the
world. So they went to the polls and removed all doubt"
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The computer programmer's national anthem is 'AAAAAAAARRRRGHHHHH!!'.
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Dangerous Home Products - AOL Home
They say that home is where the heart is, but unfortunately, it's also where everyday products pose
health dangers to you and your family. More than 33 million people are injured by common consumer products each year,
according to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, which oversaw 563 recalls
of 60.8 million individual consumer products in 2008.
(Make sure your home is safe by checking Recalls.gov.) And those are just the documented hazards.
What may be the hidden ones?
Organize & Clean - AOL Home
Sparklingly clear windows can be yours with a simple and inexpensive home
recipe
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A modern Orthodox Jewish
couple, preparing for their religious
wedding, meets with their rabbi for counseling.
The rabbi asks if they have any last questions before they leave.
The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition for men to dance with
men, and women to dance with women at the reception, but, we'd like
your permission to dance together."
"Absolutely not," says the rabbi. "It's immodest. Men and women
always
dance separately."
"So after the ceremony I can't even dance with my own wife?"
"NO!" answered the rabbi. "It's absolutely forbidden."
"Well, okay," says the man. "What about sex? Can we finally have
sex?"
"Of course!" replies the rabbi. "Sex is a mitzvah within
marriage,
to have children."
"What about different positions?" asks the man.
"No problem," says the rabbi. "It's a mitzvah."
"With the woman on top?" the man asks.
"Sure," says the rabbi. "Go for it! It's a mitzvah."
"Can we do it doggy style?"
"Sure! Another mitzvah."
"On the kitchen table?"
"Yes, yes! A mitzvah!"
"Can we do it on rubber sheets with mirrors on the ceiling, a bottle
of hot oil, a vibrator, a leather whip, a bucket of honey and a
porno video?"
"You may indeed. It's all a mitzvah."
"Can we do it standing up?"
"NO, NO, NO!" cries the Rabbi. "Absolutely NEVER standing
up!"
"Why not?" asks the man.
"Could lead to dancing."
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The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other
day that he wasn't getting any respect. The next day,
he brought a small sign that read, "I'm the Boss!"
He then taped it to his office door. Later that day when
he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped
a note to the sign that said, "Your wife called, and she
wants her sign back!"
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Your lovely mod recently saw a lovely
documentary about a lovely woman in
England
who still breastfeeds her
children. The
kids are 9 and 11 years
old. Oh, my.
The Top 9 Signs Your Child Is Too Old
to Breastfeed
9> Your first nipple piercing is caused by his braces.
8> His secretary just called to ask if you can reschedule for 11:45.
7> He frequently invites his high-school buddies for dinner.
6> He just got his Top5 Health entry published.
5> Her breasts are bigger than yours.
4> The driving instructor said she'd have to unlatch during the actual test.
3> She asks if you can hold her BlackBerry.
2> Her husband wants in on the action.
and the Number 1 Sign Your Child Is Too Old to Breastfeed...
1> He's getting a little chubby.
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Security Fix Live - washingtonpost.com
Live discussion with post.com with computer security reporter
Good site to bookmark
Spyware Protect 2009 Problems? Check Out XoftSpy SE | Spyware Blockers
Spyware Protect 2009 Problems? Check Out XoftSpy SE. Spyware is among the most serious
threats that computer users face today. In most cases, spyware is more than an
annoyance or a nuisance. It is a pathway to more dangerous kinds of ...
Heads-up: Critical Adobe Flash Player patch coming | Zero Day | ZDNet.com
According to an advisory from iDefense, the company that brokered the disclosure process,
the patch will fix a Flash Player vulnerability that could allow an attacker to use rigged
Shockwave Flash files to execute arbitrary code with the privileges of the current user.
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The Top 9 Things Not to Do While Walking the Dog
9> Write your Inaugural address while shirtless on a
paparazzi-infested Oahu beach.
8> Wear your peanut-butter shorts.
7> Toss treats to the alligators.
6> Talk trash to the neighbor's pit bull.
5> Attempt to bond with him by sniffing everything he sniffs.
4> Try out your new squirrel-pheromone-infused body lotion.
3> Compete in the Indianapolis 500.
2> Test out the tensile strength of you new hybrid necktie-leash.
and the Number 1 Thing Not to Do While Walking the Dog...
1> Moon the Westminster judges.
An Avon lady was alone in an elevator when suddenly she had
to fart. She promptly reached into her bag and sprayed the air
with her deodorizer.
Two floors later, a gentleman got on the elevator.
He began to sniff...
The Avon lady asked, "Do you smell something?"
"Well, yes I do," he replied.
"What does it smell like?"
The bemused gentleman answered, "I'm not sure, but it kinda
smells like someone shit in a pine tree."
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indianagene
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The Top 16
Favorite Movies of Animals
16> A Beautiful Mynah
15> Pup Fiction
14> Spotacus
13> Some Like It Barfed Up
12> Bark Wars, Episode II: Attack of the Bones
11> Fetch
10> Lord of the Ringworms
9> Y Tu Llama Tambien
8> Sheep's Gotta Have It
7> In Heat in the Night
6> Butt-Sniffin' in the Rain
5> Beach Blanket Dingo
4> The Muttrix
3> My Best Friend's Bedding
2> Revenge of the Herds
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Favorite Movie of Animals...
1> The Postman Always Screams Twice
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BADVETTE87
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I was in a church
meeting where the topic was "Burial or Cremation?"
Two of the people got rather worked up.
One said to the other, "If you have yourself cremated, all you will be
doing is making an ash of yourself!"
The other replied, "Well, I'm told that petroleum comes from fossilized
bones. So if you have yourself buried all you will be doing is making
a fuel of yourself!"
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An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an
ugly old crone,
entered the doctor's office. "We have come for an
examination" said the young girl.
"Alright," said the doctor. "Go behind that curtain and
take your clothes off."
"No, not me" said the girl. "it's my old aunt here."
"Very well," said the doctor. "Madam, stick out your
tongue."
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Lots of games
Free Games - Snowy Treasure Hunter 3
Build your town
Lenny's Garage - Online Games - SudokuToon
Cryptogram, word crunch, crossword jumble
Are you ready for an exciting quest of adventure and discovery? Embark on a journey around 8 ancient lands of the
Mediterranean in the search for one of the greatest mysteries of all time - the lost continent of Atlantis!
Your expedition will take you through 76 astounding levels with mystery at every turn.
Become enchanted with the riveting storyline and extremely addictive game play of this dazzling new puzzle game today!
v v v v v
Seven years after
advising women to play hard-to-get
in order to catch and marry a man, the authors of "The Rules"
are back with new tips for the world of online dating.
The Top 13 Rules of Cyber-Romance
13> Ladies: Don't let him past your firewall until the third date.
12> A chat room occupant's desirability is inversely proportional
to the coolness of his nom de chat.
11> Never tell him you love him until after he gives you his
credit card number.
10> Your Date Desirability Quotient (DDQ) is inversely
proportional to the number of cat pictures on your website.
9> Never :o on a first date.
8> Practice safe cybersex -- don't keep a chat log that your
real-world S.O. might discover.
7> Never forget which gender you're pretending to be.
6> Save the scanned photos of your gonads for the *second* date,
hotshot.
5> Always ask if "The Crying Game" was one of his favorite movies.
4> Faking your own death is an effective and fun way to end a
relationship.
3> Remember: The uglier the man, the more money he makes as a
computer programmer.
2> When pretending to be a hot 18-year-old girl, avoid
reminiscing about Mickey Mantle and Johnny Unitas.
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Rule of Cyber-Romance...
1> SEXXYTEEN@fbi.gov
is probably not your best
bet for a
late-night motel rendezvous.
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|
I am having an out-of-money experience. |
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HOT BUFFALO CHICKEN
APPETIZER
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
INGREDIENTS:
2 8-ounce blocks cream cheese, softened
2 cups cooked chicken, diced (if using canned, drain)
3/4 cup bottled Hot wing Sauce
1/2 cup chunky blue cheese salad dressing (or ranch)
2 cups shredded Colby/Jack cheese
celery sticks & corn chips or crackers for dipping
DIRECTIONS:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a 9x13 casserole dish
spread the cream cheese across bottom. Spread dressing
over cream cheese. Combine chicken with hot sauce and
spread over dressing. Top with shredded cheese.
Bake for 25 minutes until cheese is bubbly.
Serve with celery sticks and chicken crackers
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ron_stott
While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by the beer, wine, and liquor section.
One asked the other if she would like a beer. The second nun answered that, indeed, it would be very nice to have one,
but that she would feel uncomfortable about purchasing it. The first nun replied that she would handle it without a problem.
She picked up a six-pack and took it to the cashier.
The cashier had a surprised look, so the nun said, "This is for washing our hair."
Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter, put a
package of pretzel sticks in the bag with the beer, and said,
"The curlers are on me."
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Southern Style Okra
3 slices bacon
1 cup sliced okra
1 large onion, finely chopped
1 cup chopped celery
6 tomatoes, chopped
1 green bell pepper, diced
1 hot red pepper, diced
Salt and pepper, to taste
1 pint creamed corn
Fry bacon. When crisp, drain on paper towel. Sauté okra in hot fat to seal
edges. Add onion and celery.
Sauté until onion is transparent — not brown. Add tomatoes, peppers, salt and pepper.
Cook 3 to 5 minutes. Add corn; simmer 20 minutes. Serve hot or cold. Just
before serving, crumble bacon on top.
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Hartsdale Pet Cemetery and Crematory: America's First Pet Burial Grounds
Not meaning to be morbid - I just feel this is such a wonderful way
to remember your love for your pet who passed away.
Your little dog might seem like a perpetual motion machine but, in fact, the bodies of smaller breeds
expend less energy than those of bigger dogs. As a result, the muscles, bones, and internal organs of small dogs
stay healthier longer and, on average, small breeds outlive large breeds. This isn't to say that small dogs
can't run into big medical problems. Knowing the health risks of smaller
breeds is particularly important to ensure a longer life.
Ever wonder what your dog is thinking when he slurps your face like a lollipop? Is he just saying hello—
or planting the canine version of a kiss on your cheek? Although we may never know the real answer,
it helps to understand the psychology of the lick.
You and your dog can help each other live longer and healthier in just 10 easy steps.
Not only will this Healthy Steps Program,
sponsored by Purina, make your pet’s DogAge younger,
it’ll make your RealAge® younger, too!
Misbehaving Animals - Birdz -n- Wordz - OpenZine, Create & Contribute
This is so cute - Rebecca and the gang
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BAVETTE87
1947
Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little over 60 years ago,
witnesses claim that an unidentified
flying object (UFO) with five aliens aboard, crashed onto a
sheep and cattle ranch just outside
Roswell , New Mexico . This is a well known incident that many say has long
been covered up by the
U.S. Air Force and other federal agencies and organizations.
However, what you may NOT know is that in the month of April 1948, nine months
after that historic day,
the following people were born:
Albert A. Gore, Jr.
Hillary Rodham
John F. Kerry
William J. Clinton
Howard Dean
Nancy Pelosi
Dianne Feinstein
Charles E. Schumer
Barbara Boxer
See what happens when aliens breed with sheep?
I certainly hope this bit of information clears up a lot of things
for you. It did for me.
No wonder they support bills to help illegal aliens!
Now You Know.
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Starbucks says they will put religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say,
'Jesus! This cup is expensive!'”
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"President Obama
gave his first State of the Union address.
The president says he intends to expand healthcare, improve
education, and decrease energy dependence - all while cutting the
deficit in half. Then, he's going to make the Washington Monument
disappear." -Jimmy Kimmel
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Daily Ding Dong
Snatch Of The Day!
Good Fit
Finger Fun
Amateur Screw
Rump Roast
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Rockin' and Rollin' makes no endorsement or warranty,
expressed or implied, with regard to featured products or services.
Results may vary based on
operating
systems and other variables beyond our control
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Another issue on its way to YOU! and
another one already in the
making! So meet us back
here next week, same time - same place
but remember, no matter where you are or what you are doing,
never,
ever,
EVER
forget to
keep on rockin'
it's a state of mind
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©1999 - 2009 - Deborah Austin - All rights reserved and held by Rockin' and Rollin'
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